Well, hello Sunday! So long it has been since I have had the chance to sit down and stare at you while laughing hysterically. No, it's not the farty noises coming from my mouth that is making me laugh. Instead, it's the fact that after last week (with such greuling hard hours), I am sitting here at 9 pm staring out the window at the full moon, unsure of what to do with myself. Today is my third night off, and tomorrow will be my fourth. Let's top that off with me only being scheduled one day next week, and perhaps I should be laughing even harder. A one-day fucking work week? Seriously?
I am smiling in the face of the moon tonight, just hoping that lunch service really is going to become a reality; that I can make some kind of schedule out of this seemingly random me-ness that has been so prevailant the past three weeks. I am also smiling tonight because with the extra time off this week, Ben and I may be able to go to Sheep Ranch or just head off to go camping, and with the extra money that came in last week, I don't have to stress too much about having the week off. We might be able to actually sit together and chat and cook a meal together. Whew. It seems like it has been forever.
We have decided to stay in our apartment for the time being. We like the neighbors, the location is great as far as the proximity to downtown and the kids' schools. I think we will just clean the carpet and invest in some nicer furniture, and maybe call this place home for a while. It's strange, I have been thinking of this apartment as an "in between" place since we arrived in Napa, and it feels different now. This is home now. Because I am not constantly looking for something bigger and better, I am able to sit back and judge this apartment with an open mind, and just be. This place is not bad at all. I can be comfortable here, at least for a few more months.
On another note, because my issues always come up, I am slightly pissed at the internet and it's ability to broadcast family issues this evening. So, for those of you who don't know: I do not call people, and if I do call you consider yourself one of the few who happened to cross my mind during a fleeting moment of peace (and chances are I got off the phone with you because I was screaming at my children two minutes into our conversation).
If I don't call you on the phone, please do not take it personally. My child is a menace to mommy's sanity, and any moment I am on the phone is a whole new challenge for me. Send me a text, send me an email, whatever you have to do. If you call me, chances are I will not answer and I will not call you back. There are reasons for this. Today, during my three minute phone call to papa, Nate had climed to the top of the fridge and grabbed the fish food, then proceeded to dump the entire container of yummy morsels into the tank. I noticed after the call, and had to clean the fish tank thoroughly. Nate waits for me to be sidetracked to make his move. I am not avoiding you by not calling or answering my phone, I am merely accepting my role as a mother of a ifficult child. I don't know how to make it any more clear, and I will not apologize for my seemingly distant attitude.
So, the psychic. Well, the psychic said Ben and I would be stretched, and that we would have the option of going back to Ashland if needed, and that it would cross my mind at least once. Also, he said it wouldn't be necessary, and that I should just hold on when the feeling came. He said that entrepreneualism and schooling was seen in my horizon, and that we would be doing great by September. Cheers to the psychic, he's been right on so far!
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